I don’t know how it happened, but I have become a very weak person.

It pains me to say it, and I wish it weren’t true, but I have to face facts. I am a weak, weak man, on pretty much every level. And it’s slowly killing me.

The weakness begins with my body. I am shockingly, sickeningly unfit. I literally cannot run for more than one minute straight. The last time I tried to do a bench press I couldn’t even lift the unweighted bar. On top of that, I feel utterly exhausted most of the time, to the point where even small, day-to-day tasks require monumental effort. Quite often the only thing my body feels fit to do is sleep.

The weakness continues in my mind. I feel increasingly these days that my brain is shrouded in a thick and impenetrable fog. I struggle to think clearly, to concentrate on tasks, to remember conversations. I am maddeningly disorganised and woefully lacking in self discipline. I also feel much less creative than I once did, and as a person who thrives on ideas, this is very upsetting.

But perhaps saddest of all, the weakness has also infected my spirit. I used to be the kind of happy-go-lucky guy who sailed through life without a care. Now it’s like the opposite is true: most days I feel frustrated, hopeless and depressed. Bitterness and resentment, formerly unknown aliens, have become two of my closest companions. Sometimes I even find myself avoiding other people to avoid infecting them with my bad vibes.

So yeah. I’m in a bad way.

Needless to say, this is not what I want my life to look like. I want to spring out of bed each morning bounding with energy and excited to take on the day. I want my mind to be crystal clear, razor sharp and brimming with good ideas. I want to be happy, confident and eager to share my gifts with the world.

In short, I want to be strong. I want to overcome my weakness and step into my power. And I’ve come to the conclusion that the best way to do that is to get fit.

The benefits of exercise are of course unversally acknowledged. From stress reduction to increased energy, reduced risk of illness to better sleep, there’s no doubt that physical activity is essential to living a healthy life. I think a major factor in my current state of ill health is the fact that I’ve now passed the big three-oh and the booze soaked excess of my younger years has started to catch up with me. As such, I’ve come to appreciate the value of being healthy more than ever.

But even more interesting to me are the psychological benefits that can accrue from getting in shape. We all know by now that our brains release endorphins when we exercise: I have definitely felt better about myself whenever I’ve been more active. And, as I’ve got more and more into the field of personal development, I’ve read over and over and over again about the correlation between physical fitness individual success. I now want to apply that insight to my own life.

This blog, then, is about my journey to fitness. My aim is not to become an Olympic athlete, but rather to explore how the process of getting in shape can lift me out of my current malaise and set me on the path to living my dreams. I will experiment with different sports, workouts, regimes and classes, incorporating the best of what I find into my life. I will also explore the world of nutrition, trying out different foods and ways of eating with the aim of optimising my diet for maximum performance.

I’m hoping that committing to this blog will mark the beginning of a new chapter in my life, one in which I start to break free from the shackles of fear and begin finding the courage to go after what I want. I have no idea how the story will unfold, but right now I’m sure as hell excited to start. Follow me to see what happens next 🙂

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